People have always seen me as helpless. I don’t know why that is the case. Now being taken care of started with my parents, that is a given when you have good parents. I have always lived with my parents, my grandmother, an aunt, a cousin, and four siblings. I remember writing about how Dad took extra care of me. I was a woose (sic), afraid of the boogeyman. Later, my family did everything for me from sewing for me, (a school project), to knitting for me. I was never allowed to do things be myself. At home I knew they loved me and just wanted to do things for me.
Now the trouble started when everyone else felt that I looked helpless. I am not a frail looking person. When people aren’t around I can actually do things by myself. Strange people were always trying help me cross the street or helping me up a small embankment. I couldn’t go any place where people weren’t trying to help me. I traveled to the Dominican Republic and Jamaica by myself. When I got there people started to help me. I couldn’t do anything without being attacked with many people invading my space. I couldn’t say no to all these people trying to help me. I thought it was rude to say “No, Thanks.”
Later on I went to Israel to excavate an ancient site called Hazor. There were about 130 different cultures who all spoke English. I did not now anyone there, also, I was one of the oldest people there. I was in excellent health. I had started to dig and kept a low profile so I wouldn’t get people to try to help me.
Three weeks after I had been there without anyone trying to help me a strange thing happened. There were about six Spaniards who didn’t know that I understood Spanish. As they began telling jokes, one the jokes made laugh. Right away they got very excited and asked if I understood what they were saying. I just nodded to them. Later I told them that some people thought I spoke bad Spanish. I knew right at that moment that I should’ve kept a low profile. From that moment they began to hold my hand and helped me cross the large rocks that I had crossed by myself earlier. They held my hand when we went to breakfast on the excavate sight. Not only did the Spaniards help me but a Korean man also helped me. I had wanted go to Jerusalem on the bus by myself. The Korean said he would go with me. I asked “Are also going to Jerusalem?” His response was “No, I’m escorting you.” I asked “Why?” He said “I don’t want you to go by yourself.” He followed me and looked out for me. I really felt stupid that no one trusted me.
I am nearly 69 years old and of course I am a senior. People still continue to try to help me. My younger brother Mark has held my hand when I cross the street. I kept telling him that I don’t need any help. He feels that I don’t know how to cross the street alone. He brings me dinner to my room. When I tell I’ll go to the table to eat he says no. My other brother Jeff washes my clothes, he doesn’t feel I can do that. My brother Mano dries my clothes and folds them. He tells me “I will dry them.” I tried once to dry my clothes and got a lecture from my brothers.
Even when I travel far away from my siblings, there are always people that continue to stop what they are doing to help me. When my cousin’s husband died I just mentioned once that I didn’t eat meat. I really wasn’t going to eat. I thought that I would eat something later. As excepted, they brought me a plate of vegetables and a large plate of fruit. I knew they bought the plate just for me.
I guess I’ll have to accept the fact that all my life people will continue to help poor frail me.